“You know you’re a real parent when you catch vomit in your hands rather than let it fall on the carpet.”

I'm a Mumbai-based writer who loves all things pop culture and feminism.

Responses have also been taken from threads 1, 2, and 3. 

"I want my kid (and one on the way) to see us model an egalitarian household where either parent can fill any role. I'm focused on my mental health. I take lots of breaks, I do therapy, I spend more time in nature. I want to keep my head clear so I don't follow in the footsteps of my dad who was a really angry dad.Being a dad has been the best thing I've experienced in life yet and its definitely the most important thing to me along with being a husband. Everything else is to keep us happy." — BlueMountainDace

"This has probably been the biggest one for me as an older dad (41yo) of young kids (2yo and NB). The thought of leaving them on this earth pains me to no end. I did a lot of crazy stuff when I was younger: racing sportbikes, tech diving, going to really crazy places to hunt/fish, working as a PMC, etc. I only hunt/fish now and take so many precautions because I really don't want an untimely death and leave them behind. There are even some mornings where I just say "Screw it, I'm staying warm and cozy and safe" and don't go.

Same with health things. This year I was diagnosed with early heart disease which is manageable, but it was a hard pill to swallow. So now, every decision I make is with them in mind. Exercising, eating healthy, seeing my docs regularly, and so on.

But now, the thought of dying and leaving them behind evokes this deep, emotional pain I can't even describe. On the same token, I am scared. I am not scared of dying, but leaving my wife and kids behind." — Anonymous

"And your reaction to it as well. I was holding my son at about six  months trying to comfort him and he absolutely soaked me in vomit. Still holding him in one arm I’m like, “It’s ok, let it out little man” completely accepting of the fact my t-shirt is ending up in the bin and I have a lot of cleaning to do." — plastic-superhero

"With every milestone in life there will be change, for good or bad. Having a child is a net positive in so many ways if you let it be. Life is hard, children can make it seem harder but damn, the feeling you get when they first say I love you, or look so proud when they've done something new for the first time, it's a feeling that no drug could even compare to.Long story short, fatherhood has made me feel more, made me care more, and made me a better person." — Gingerfurrdjedi

"Patience is a big one. Also, yin and yang between you and mommy. If she is freaking out or melting down over something you damn well better be the calm one. There will come a time when you need her to be." — maddux808

"This may sound trite or cliche, but now that I've been a dad for about 18 months I'm just more relaxed. I used to look at it as two jobs—engineer during the day and then trying to clothe, bathe, and feed my daughter at night while my wife gets a business degree. But now, I can't honestly wait to show her something new...or let her taste something new. All that crap that we drudge through life doing is all new to her." — graps

Responses have been edited for length and clarity.